Written by Kendyl Jones on February 22, 2018
We won’t call 911 unless we’re terribly hurt. We won’t call it an emergency unless we or someone around us is in so much trouble there’s no other option. When all is fine and well, there’s no need for a 911 call. If there was no evil in the world, no sickness or no pain, we wouldn’t ever need 911.
When I began struggling with depression and anxiety in 2014, everyday life and daily struggles were a whole new playing field—a foreign country I had never traveled to before. I didn’t know what protocol was when I was overcome with panic.
I knew to take the medicine I was prescribed and hope that the racing thoughts, nausea and fear would go away. For a long time, I relied on those pills to get me through a single day, always keeping one nearby when the inevitable, irrational panic struck.
But I didn’t want my life to hinge on medication. I wanted freedom from the crippling fear that seemed to creep into my life for no evident reason. I had no reason to be depressed. I had no reason to believe that life would be better if I wasn’t living it.
For a short time, the anxiety and depression left. I went about my day-to-day, having no breakdowns or panic-stricken moments that inhibited me from enjoying life.
But it came back, as unexpected and abrupt as before. And instead of asking for medicine, I asked for Jesus. I begged and cried, asking Him for any kind of help to deliver me from the cage I felt locked in. I knelt down on the floor in my office at work, door locked and window covered, crying in pain, afraid that I would struggle with this paralyzing fear for the rest of my life.
Every day for more than a month I prayed, asking God to come as fast as possible and take the darkness out of my soul. I was hopeless, so I prayed a 911 prayer. And He fixed me. He healed my brain, thank goodness. He removed the fear, the panic, the anxiety.
See, I think God wants our 911 prayers. He wants us to look to Him in moments that are too much to handle. What better way to cure a broken soul than the one who saved it?
But for me, when the pain was over and the days were normal and the anxiety and depression were over, I stopped praying. I stopped getting on my knees. I no longer found myself desperate to feel His presence because, thankfully, He fixed me. But how selfish of me to take what I needed and not praise Him for it!
I now find myself looking to Jesus for everything. I don’t send up 911 prayers. I talk to God regularly because He deserves it, doesn’t he?
He wants a relationship with me! He doesn’t want to be my emotional genie or my soul mechanic alone. He wants my everyday prayers. I make it a point now to thank God for even
the smallest things. I seek Him regularly in scripture and in prayer, because when the time comes, I would rather jump in an ambulance with someone that I know than someone that I don’t.
Make God your everyday God, not just your 911 God. Don’t misunderstand—RUN to God when you are in trouble. Run to Him before you run to anything else. Nothing can ever cure you or make you whole other than the precious blood of Jesus. He is waiting, arms wide open, when you seek Him in dark times in your life.
But He waits for you in the bright times too. Our precious Jesus Christ longs for you to seek His face in the ordinary, when times are good. Don’t wait until disaster, sickness, depression or financial struggles strike. Know Jesus NOW, seek him NOW, so that when those things inevitably strike you’ll know that the Great Physician is already on your side.
And when it’s over—when you’re months separated from the pain that was so real to you before, praise Him still for the miracles he’s always working in your life. He deserves our neverending attention and recognition.
Creative Writer/Produceer/Digital Assets Manager